textiles · exploration · misadventure

Stupid Oxytocin (aka Sex Voodoo)


OK, I know this is an old post. However. I am a huge fan of archive archeology. I can’t resist buried gems, and this needed to come to light. This woman’s self-propelled expedition through her own deepest trauma, and her humor and poise while dealing—vocally and articulately—with abuse, depression, and alcoholism have me indisputably hooked. Unconfirmed Bachelorette is still blogging away, three and a half years later.

unConfirmed Bachelorette

I’ve known for years that sex makes me do stupid things. It’s smart to hold off on rolling around in the sack until I know the potential lover pretty well, although I rarely do so. I know it’s smart to wait, not because he’ll be more inclined to take me home to meet his mother (men who still need mommy’s approval really aren’t high on my list); but rather, because I’m more inclined to keep my head on straight long enough to determine whether the man is someone worthy of being in my life and in my bed. You see, I’ve learned that once I sleep with a man, along with my panties, my good sense flies right out the car window.

I’ve termed this phenomenon “sex voodoo.” For years that’s all I knew about it. Sleep with a man, and I make poor choices. My standards become virtually non-existent. I turn into one of those women about whom you whisper to…

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4 thoughts on “Stupid Oxytocin (aka Sex Voodoo)

  1. Wow, thanks for the reblog and the very kind introduction. Archive archeology at times makes me cringe. But at least there’s a semblance of evolution.


    • Well, thanks for the brilliant blog and close-to-the-bone sharing of your life. I had a moment after I reblogged when I thought, “Oh shit. I should have checked if I’m supposed to ask her permission or something. I hope this is ok…” eeeek.
      I know what you mean about past writing making you cringe, at least from my personal journaling perspective since my blog’s not very old. This is only the third or fourth blog I’ve dug like this on; it’s rare for me, and I’m really, really enjoying digging into your archeology; it’s just so fucking REAL and un-cringeworthy.

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      • I’m sincerely flattered, Curvy. I apologize if you bumped up against some bad links. I recently made some of my more sensitive posts private. Self-censorship. There’s got to be a better way. But I haven’t figured out what it is yet.


  2. You know, I haven’t come across any bad links. Possibly I haven’t arrived at the posts in question yet. I’ve heard that you can set some posts to be accessible via passwords, but I don’t know how to set that up, and I don’t know if that’ any better, anyway. Possibly it’s the nature of the beast and there’s nothing to be done.
    Still digging, almost to China, and completely freaking blown away. I’ll have to tell you sometime about some of the overlap in the events of our lives.